The Mummy Chronicles
Posted by: , March 7, 2010 in 11:17 am
Mean Mommy came out of her cave again last night. I keep hoping that she will go on a nice, long, tropical vacation somewhere or even get the chance to tour the vineyards in Italy but it doesn’t look promising.
Everyone told me that it isn’t the Terrible Two’s I had to watch out for the but Tantrum Three’s. They were quite right. I have never seen anything so dramatic, over the top or hysterical than the tantrums thrown by my daughter. She makes the women on ‘Rock of Love’ or the ‘Bad Girls Club’ look like nuns. At one point right around the holidays she seemed to have turned over a new leaf. We breathed a quiet, stealthy sigh of relief and made the sign of the cross. Weeks went by and our house was a happy home. Dinners were ate with quiet conversation. Errands were run without hysterical sobbing episodes. All was quiet on the western front.
…read more
Posted by: , February 27, 2010 in 12:05 pm
Each time I’m pregnant it gets worse. The “pregnancy brain” and its forgetfulness is much more apparent, my body grows more weary and I can do less and less at a time. Gone are the long runs or even the short ones. Dance Party USA with my two kids at our house becomes a distant memory. That is unless I want to throw up for long periods of time afterwards. Thanks, but I’ll pass. Someone else can run the dance party and tunes.
…read more
Posted by: , January 23, 2010 in 2:22 pm
Due to the SURPRISE! we received recently when we found out we were unexpectedly going to be parents for the third time, I compiled this list. I need to alright. I’m sicker than the last two and I was just fitting into my old clothes again from the second kid. Nards!
So here we go- Top Ten Reasons it’s Good to be Pregnant-Again!
1. New baby gear. Because I got rid of it all just six months ago when I thought we were done.
2. Shopping! Even if it’s for maternity clothes.
3. I get to eat as many bagels as I want and I don’t care. Seriously. I am going through them like their candy. I should buy stock in cream cheese while I’m at it.
…read more
Posted by: Victoria Mason, January 12, 2010 in 8:28 pm
With one child it was not so bad. I made her lunch, served it and typically ate alongside her. Adding a second child into the mix, in full high-chair utilizing mode, has suddenly made lunchtime incredibly crazy. I have begun to do everything the “experts” say not to do. I eat standing up. I eat on the run. I never feel relaxed or satisfied. When lunchtime is over I’m hard pressed to tell you just what exactly it was that I ate. If I try to sit down to eat my own food someone else needs more milk, more fruit, more whatever. More everything. Each time I sit down there is another request. So now I no longer sit.
I was discussing this with my mother this week and she said, “Just do what my mother did, she had four kids after all.” Apparently my grandmother simply made an announcement one day that when she sat down to eat she wasn’t getting up until she was finished. That’s it. I decided to employ this rule in my house and it worked too. I made every one’s lunch, didn’t serve it until everything was ready for everyone and when I did, I made sure I sat down too. As I sat at the table I explained to the kids, “I need to eat at the same time as you, I will not be getting up until I am finished with my food. If you need anything you can get it yourself or wait until I am done. That is how it will work from now on. Understand?” And for the most part they did.
It takes me more advance thinking on my part as well as coordination and planning to serve everyone all at once instead of as I make the food, but I’m more sane and relaxed this way. If I’m more sane, then so is everyone else.
Posted by: Victoria Mason, January 5, 2010 in 11:19 am
The cute Cheshire grin is still there. She still wants me when she’s hurt or tired for a quick cuddle too. However, the independent streak has already begun. Just over a year, my youngest, my baby is now beginning to assert herself and sparks of personality are beginning to shine through.
She no longer eats whatever we feed her. She’s not content to just be plopped on the floor and play with whatever her older sister has discarded. Nope. She’s her own person now. One who toddles about the house at a faster and faster speed each week. She prefers her yellow blanket over any other and hates cottage cheese. She wants to join in the fun most days but sometimes adamantly declares the need to be alone. Today she slammed a door in my face. She’s not even twelve yet for goodness sake.
She loves music and will dance to any beat she hears. She is full of smiles and laughs easily. At thirteen months she no longer follows her sister wherever she goes or me for that matter. Little Miss Independence has proclaimed herself.
Posted by: Victoria Mason, December 22, 2009 in 7:54 pm
Hey, did you hear? It snowed this weekend. A lot, about seven loaves of bread worth according to my local weatherman. Stranded in the house, losing out on my quarterly hair appointment (read 2.5 hours of total bliss – no cell phones, no children plus scalp massage) all I could do was stare out the window as the snow continued to come down.
Truthfully, I could not wait to get out there. The more snow that fell the more excited I became. I kept a steady stream of snowy weather commentary going with my three year-old as I regaled her with tales of snow time activities that we would soon be able to partake in. When it was time to start shoveling, I bundled her up and took her outside with me. We trudged around the neighborhood taking great pleasure in “Momma! We can walk in the street?!” When all was quiet and dark, but still snowing, my husband and I bundled her up for a second time and headed out for a night walk. I have such fond memories of walking and sledding with my parents at night. The streetlights casting a yellow glow to the snow making it all look like sparkly spun sugar. There is something so special about night sledding.
The next day, when the real shoveling began, we took her out again. After an hour of shoveling I took a break and decided to make her an igloo. Then a snow tunnel. As I dug it out, packed and smoothed the snow and generally spent about two and a half hours “just playing” in the snow, I realized something. Aside from my husband, I was the only adult on the block playing in the snow, without my kid. She had abandoned us long before, heading inside for ‘hot chocoh’. The adults simply came out to shovel their cars out, clear their sidewalks and bitch. Not a single snowball was made or thrown. No one admired the beauty of the snow, the wonder of it so close to Christmas or the fact that just for a little while life slowed down. We could stop thinking and doing and simply be. For me, apparently that means I can ‘just be’ twelve.
That’s fine. At this time of year I could use the mental break that being twelve creates. I wonder if this means I can bail on Santa’s cookies, paying the mortgage and doing the laundry.
Posted by: Victoria Mason, December 15, 2009 in 12:07 pm
We are all sick. Again. What’s this? Like the thirtieth time this season? Realistically, I can count about four times since Halloween. I’m done. I am sick of being sick. No more! No MORE!
I am sick of…
-buying tissues, picking up tissues, and prying shredded, used tissues out of the baby’s mouth.
-buying cough supressant, homeopathic remedies in bulk, vitamins, juice and cough drops. I could run a pharmacy from my house at this point. It’s true! And I would pass out old Halloween candy as treats too.
-wiping snot. Suctioning snot. Smearing snot.
-that red spot under my nose. It’s raw, itchy and burning. It may be red but it so does not go with my holiday party outfits this year. That red spot will land me on the worst-dressed list to be sure.
-not enjoying play dates, school or a normal workout routine because some or all of us are… SICK!
No H1N1 here. No actual pox. Just the plain ol’ average and irritating cold has knocked us down again. I want to rail against it. I want to filibuster this cold into non-existence, but it just won’t budge. It laughs at me as I wipe down doorknobs and Lysol every chair and surface in my home. “Resistance is futile”, it says with an evil, phlegmy laugh. Rest for Dr. Mom is but a dream.
Posted by: Victoria Mason, December 8, 2009 in 10:56 am
In the last year we’ve added a new kid to our household. We have gone on to another year of preschool, added in another rental property, had money woes and a touch of job loss. Pretty average I suppose.
In this time I’ve kept up the house as much as possible with two kids under three. In fact, I think our house is pretty damn sparkling, especially compared to others on our block. I keep my car cleaner than most too. I continue to try and work from home getting up two hours before the kids each day and using all nap times to meet deadlines. In the last few months sickness rained down on all of us and I’ve had more than my share of female/birth control issues since this last kid. Including one scare.
…read more
Posted by: , November 29, 2009 in 11:02 pm
Scene: The family is sitting around the living room post-Thanksgiving meal. My husband’s grandmother is playing Scrabble with a few other family members, including my mother-in-law and brother-in-law.
Brother-in-law: Grandma! That is not a word! What is that?
Mother-in-law: No, I don’t think that is a word. What are you trying to spell?
Grandma: Gat. G-A-T. It’s another word for gun. It is a word. (Note the imperious tone.)
No one messes with a Scrabble playing Grandma who knows her guns and slang.
Posted by: , November 20, 2009 in 11:19 am
It’s that time of year again. The time to make lists. Shopping lists, gift lists, card lists, menu planning lists and what to wear or pack lists. Exhausting, no?
Nope. I think it is exhilarating! There is nothing more anticipatorythan breaking out a fresh sheet of paper and starting a new list. Wait, there is something better! It’s crossing off all the items on the list and realizing you have actually completed a set of tasks. Your objective for the day or holiday is complete and now you can sit back and relax and enjoy yourself. As a parent of two small children and a list person this is the only way I get stuff done and can remember what exactly I was doing last. Because I know it wasn’t cleaning up peanut butter off the floor. That was definitely not on the list.
There in lies the key to all this. The list isn’t to create more work or little list babies. It’s the sharpening of a point. The key to your organization and staying on track to get the job done. It’s a tiny schedule without time lines designed to help you focus. Now if you’ll excuse me my list says I have to make a packing list so that I can follow my original list of all that I need to get done today. Like cleaning peanut butter covered in Cheerios off the floor.
