Welcome Jill! Congratulations on being our celebrated Mom of the Week! With our vast community of mothers here on ConnectingMoms, I’m sure there are many that will breathe a sigh of relief after reading more about honestbaby. Let’s get started.

Can you tell us about honestbaby, and your inspiration behind it?

Honestbaby celebrates the imperfect journey of parenting. Our site features fun children’s t-shirts that poke fun at parenting and a non-judgmental community where parents can share their stories.

The minute I was handed my first baby, I felt bombarded with the ways to do it RIGHT and the ways to do it WRONG. I was surrounded by Mommy Police; family, friends, doctors, so-called “experts”, and strangers on the street all telling me how to be the perfect parent. It took having two children for me to discover that there are NO ANSWERS. Barring established medical facts, like the use of car seats and not drinking poison, everyone is just guessing. There are lots of theories and opinions and of course on occasion, some helpful advice. But when it comes down to it, the truth is, there is no “right” way to raise a child. Parenting is an IMPERFECT experience. 

Where did you come across the idea of ‘perfect parenting’ that you discuss on your website?

Society promotes the idea that new parents should be experiencing wonderment and bliss right from the start. If parents just do things the RIGHT way then everything will fall into place. We hear it from the Mommy Police and the constant onslaught of parenting theories covered in the media. It’s everywhere. Just last month the New York Times had an article titled, “Breast-feed or Else”.

Some people may consider your site somewhat controversial. What kind of feedback have you received from your website?

Mostly people have been relieved to find a forum where they can be honest and not be judged for their parenting choices. It seems we’ve scared away most of the Mommy Police so I haven’t really experienced any backlash.

Can you tell us a little about you family? How many children do you have, and there ages?

My family includes my extremely supportive husband, Craig and my extremely active two boys, Jack (4) and Wyatt (almost 2).

Was the pressure of being one of these so-called “perfect parents” one of your fears or concerns before you became a parent or was it something you felt after having children?

Interestingly, before I had children I wasn’t aware of the pressures of “perfect parenting”. You don’t really see it until you’re in it. It’s almost a new language that I learned with words I’d never heard before; nipple confusion, ferberizing, colic, co-sleeping, 10th percentile, 90th percentile, early-walker, late-talker, time-outs. I remember being surprised by all of the anxiety that we as parents create.

Did you have any fears or concerns about becoming a mom?

Again, I was blissfully ignorant. I figured it would all work itself out. I was more concerned about going through labor. If only I knew then that giving birth would be the easy part J I remember taking a “Caring for Your New Baby” class with my husband at the hospital, dropping the doll and us laughing through the whole thing. We had no concept of what we were about to embark on.

What is a typical day like for you?

There is no such thing as a typical day. I still work with a feature film writer two days a week and have to take care of the kids in between. Add in my honestbaby work and my schedule is ever changing with lots of juggling going on. Then there are the things that I didn’t plan on. I could have the boys all ready to go for school, have their lunch packed, jackets on and realize I locked the keys in the car (that happened last week). Or my youngest keeps me up all night (like yesterday) and I spend the day shuttling the kids from play-dates to music class to karate, in a daze. Or instead of going into New York for meetings, like I’d planned, my babysitter cancels, and I take the kids bowling (and have a great time). Or I’m frantic with work stress, trying to return emails, when my son gives me a hug and tells me that he loves me, and that he painted his little brother’s head blue (last month). Every day is different and full of surprises.

Do you feel debates about parenting and parenting techniques have gone too far, especially in the media? Do you feel this is detrimental?

Yes the debates have gone too far. And yes I think it is detrimental. It’s not helpful for parents to be inundated with so many voices and being constantly judged on their parenting.

Your website is a wonderful resource for parents. Did you plan on starting a website? How did it all begin?

I was actually put off by a site (which will remain nameless) that is filled with Mommy Police giving their various opinions. When moms would share their stories they were made to feel like they were doing things “wrong”. It was not a community that instilled confidence and it was not productive. I felt there had to be another way. At the same time, I conceived the idea of playful t-shirts for babies that would poke fun at our parenting stress. Imperfect Parenting is a concept that was long overdue.

Now that your site is growing, how do you manage it? What has been your biggest challenge?

It’s a lot more work than I had planned on. But everyday is fun and exciting. My biggest challenge is prioritizing. The site and clothing line are growing so quickly and there is only so much time in the day. Every morning I have to make choices on what to focus on and hope things aren’t falling through the cracks.

How many registered users do you have on honestbaby?

In less than six months, we already have over 1500 registered users. We also have about 40,000 unique visitors coming to the site each month.

What do you hope happens with your site in the future?

I hope that the honestbaby brand can grow to become synonymous with non-judgmental parenting. We would like our site to be a place where parents will go when they need to share their stories and get support. Hopefully honestbaby can help moms gain confidence in their parenting choices and silence the Mommy Police in their lives. As it develops I hope that our articles, videos, pictures and clothing can inform, entertain and empower parents.

Has working on honestbaby improved your lifestyle?

Working on honestbaby has allowed me to step back and take a breath. Now when I find someone creating parenting anxiety, I can put it in perspective. It’s challenging to find the time to give to honestbaby without infringing on my family. But it’s invigorating to build something that I believe in.

Surely it’s scarce, but what do you do in your free time?

Yes, free time is scarce. I try to make sure I’m always wrapped up in a great book, which I usually only get to read for 15 minutes before I go to sleep. I also love seeing movies the old-fashioned way, in the theater, and playing tennis.

Do your children know about honestbaby?

They’re too young to understand what I’m doing but that doesn’t stop me from making them model my shirts!

Where do you get the material for honestbaby? Do you write most of it or do others contribute?

We write some of our stuff, we have outside contributors, and we put up articles from other sites that we think our audience will like.

Did you come up with the idea for the tee shirts featured on your site? Do you design them?

Yes and yes. It’s been somewhat of an adventure since I have no background in fashion and I’m basically learning as I go.

Is the merchandise sold anywhere else aside from your website?

We are in a few local boutiques. I recently came up with some new designs for our shirts that use different fabrics and colors. They will be shown to stores next month through a sales rep.

Do you think the ideas from honestbaby can be applied to other aspects of life?

There will always be people in all aspects of your life telling you what to do and judging your choices. My sister, who is in the dating world, is constantly being judged on how she goes about “finding a husband”. Whether it’s your relationships, yur career, your appearance…don’t let peoples’ expectations get to you.

Is there any message in particular that you hope parents learn from your site?

Have confidence in your own choices. Others are going through the same thing. Don’t take all the parenting pressures out there too seriously.

Do you have any tips or advice for other mothers who are looking to start their own website?

Expect a HUGE time commitment. And just keep going. Even if you doubt yourself work through it. Don’t give up. And surround yourself with a good support system, which should include positive people and reliable babysitting.

Do you hope your children will learn from your site?

I hope my children, when they are older, can see how important parenting well means to all of us. And that it does come from a place of love. But I also want them to see what their poor mothers went through!

Finally, what are some words of wisdom that you would like to offer our mom members at ConnectingMoms?

Don’t let anyone make you feel like you’re a bad mother. There are no RIGHT answers in parenting. Embrace the imperfections and just do your best, because truly that’s all we can really do.

Jill, thank you so much for taking the time to conduct this interview with us. Mothers around the world who are living in fear of doing all things right, now have a place to turn to. We wish you all the best in all your endeavors and hope to see you around ConnectingMoms!